“I don't always like writing, but I very much like having written.” -- William Gibson

“When you listen to Bruce’s music, you aren’t a loser. You are a character in an epic poem about losers.” -- Jon Stewart

"If art doesn't seem dangerous for the artist, it probably isn't relevant." -- Scott Adams

"I warm naturally to the drummer whose ideas and approach are strong, even if he doesn't quite have the ability to carry them out." -- Bill Bruford

"It's a shame cars don't run on cognitive dissonance." -- Lewis Black, The Daily Show

"Google is arguably the first company to be born with the alien intelligence of the Web's large-N statistics hard-wired into its DNA." -- Chris Anderson, The Long Tail blog

"And I hold onto that belief despite the fact that I belong to a party whose only true talent is writing exceedingly eloquent concession speeches." -- Sarah Vowell, New York Times

"I'm convinced that the most important division in human affairs is probably not the one between left and right, liberal and conservative. It's the one between zealotry and understanding, between absolute conviction and compromise, between preachers and politicians." -- Bill Keller, New York Times

"The plot details of B movies are irrational: accept that people do things that are contradictory, against their own best interests, have short term aims & limited attention span, and do incredibly stupid things while things blow up. Apart from things blowing up, this is just like the music industry." -- Robert Fripp

"Props will be withheld until the showing and proving has commenced." -- Riley, The Boondocks

"Wow. You survived the blackout. You're made of stronger stuff...than ice cream." -- Lewis Black

"If your numbers are boring, then you've got the wrong numbers." -- Edward Tufte

"What keeps 'The Matrix' relevant is its unconventional subtext that a great leather trench coat may well be the best defense." -- The New York Times

"I continue to explain that plot inconsistencies in B movies are consistent, and should not be allowed to undermine one's enjoyment of the action, nor the fundamental credibility of the storyline: the good & bad guys are clearly delineated & easily recognizable, the hero duffs over the baddies, things blow up loudly & spectacularly, the good guy wins. Entirely credible." -- Robert Fripp

"Our show is obviously at a disadvantage with any of the other news shows we're competing against. For one thing, we are fake. They are not. So in terms of credibility, we are ... well, oddly enough we're about even." -- Jon Stewart

"My mom was a bitch, too, but I don't go writing songs about it." -- Triumph the Comic Dog, on Eminem

"I don't watch much ESPN. Unless they have soccer on." -- Mick Jagger

"I really think college is completely unnecessary for 80 percent of the population. Had anybody who knew anything talked to me for half an hour they could have saved me a lot of time." -- Jimmy Kimmel

"As the saying goes, grant me the courage to change the things I can change, the patience to accept the things I can�t, the wisdom to tell the difference, and the power to destroy my enemies." -- Dan Loney, CyberSoccerNews

"If I wanted to be a bitter old fuck, I could�ve stayed in Trenton. I could've stayed sitting at the bar going 'I could've done this, or I could've done that.' The truth is, until you go out there and do it, you can�t really open your mouth." -- Jon Stewart

"The psychology degree is simply that I was a chemistry major, and they kept wanting the correct answer, whereas in psychology you basically write whatever you want, and chances are you get a B." -- Jon Stewart

"It's modern, popular music, and for somebody who isn't really qualified to call himself a musician to claim he's making art is, at the very best, delusional." -- Gene Simmons

"My review of 2001, the year, is the same as my review of 2001: A Space Odyssey. It went on too long, it was hard to follow, and you could only enjoy it if you were really, really, *really* stoned." -- Lewis Black

"You can't do anything interesting with cutting-edge technology except not make it cutting-edge." -- Brian Eno

"I think your webzine is shitty, stupid, and pompous, and your musical taste sucks." -- Kirby Nixon

"Wow. You're all cool." -- Rachel George

"I call upon all nations to do everything they can to stop these terrorist killers. Thank you. Now watch this drive." -- George W. Bush, on the Middle East and the golf course

"The masses have never been arbiters of the sublime, and they often fail to recognize the truly great individual. Taking into account the public's regrettable lack of taste, it is incumbent upon you not to fit in." -- Janeane Garofalo

"It is not true that people who accomplish things don't waste time and that people who waste time don't accomplish things. The very concept is ill-informed. You can't waste time and you can't save time; you can only choose what you do at any given moment." -- James Gleick

"This is going to sound totally corny, but the idea is to honor fans for their enthusiasm, rather than just manipulate them into buying more products." -- Matt Groening

Edmund Blackadder: "Baldrick, have you no idea what irony is?"
Baldrick: "Yeah, it's like goldy and bronzy, only it's made of iron."
-- Black Adder III, Episode 5: Amy and Amiability

"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read." -- Groucho Marx

"I think it's about time the world embraced its geekiness and stopped trying to be cool. It's just...you have way more fun as a geek than as a cool person." -- Shirley Manson, Garbage

"People can whine like Fran Drescher about WGN-Ch. 9 dumping a batch of Cubs telecasts over to cable's CLTV this season. But there is no planet on which 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer' is less entertaining than a regular-season Cubs game, and not only because Sarah Michelle Gellar is cuter than Gary Gaetti." -- Steve Johnson, Chicago Tribune TV Critic

"Business logic and musical logic are utterly incompatible." -- Robert Fripp

"I would like, with the sun shining through the window on a crisp early-autumnal mid-morning, with a sufficiency of Monster Cappucino flowing in my veins to prompt minimal sentience, to declare my view for the record that Drummer Jokes are a cruel and pernicious form of humour introduced to the world by under-humoured persons lacking in sensitivity and concern for other drummers." -- Robert Fripp

"I just think it is interesting to try and lie without speaking." -- Teller, Penn & Teller

"You can't juggle milk." -- Toby, The Buckets

"The GOP is a consistent advocate of reducing government power and control, except on the many occasions when it wants to expand government power and control. (Democrats, of course, are just the opposite)." -- Stephen Chapman, Chicago Tribune